


Game Over

by PlayerOneMell



Category: Be More Chill
Genre: JEREMY STOP, M/M, Michael loves too much, Self Harm, Suicide, Suicide Pact, angsty angst, breakdowns and more breakdowns, gay angst, post squip, the last 'I love you'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-03-13
Packaged: 2019-03-30 21:33:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13960458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlayerOneMell/pseuds/PlayerOneMell
Summary: Michael and Jeremy state time and time again that life is a two player game. Player One being Michael, and Player Two being Jeremy. The life of the video game isn't the same without both players playing the game, no matter how horrific. But with such challenges, can they really make it through this level?





	Game Over

Jeremy and Michael both have their issues, but they always thought more of each other then themselves. Michael wears bracelets around his wrist to hide the shameful things he’s done, and Jeremy tugs at his cardigan sleeve. They always seemed to be looking at each other’s arms. Michael had stopped awhile ago, so there’s nothing new. Michael just can't help this overwhelming shame he feels about it. Jeremy, however, is addicted to the pain. He’s afraid. But he seems…happy? 

“Jeremy, this isn’t healthy.” Michael says cleaning off Jeremy’s new cut. “We made a deal about this.”  
“Mikey no! Please don’t. Not because I slipped.” Jeremy’s crying.  
“Jeremy, I promised you I would! I can’t go back on my own word.” Michael says finishing the bandaging of Jeremy’s arm.  
“If you do it, I’ll kill myself.” 

Michael froze. Jeremy always says he is afraid of dying, and never makes jokes. Michael feels his heart drop into his feet. He looks at Jeremy with tears in his eyes. He made the promise awhile ago that if Jeremy cut, he would too, but with this threat Michael's not sure he should follow through.

“Are you serious?” Michael asks.  
“Yes.” Jeremy nods.  
“Then I won’t, but you need to stop.” Michael sighs. 

Jeremy and Michael seem to have tried everything to get Jeremy to stop, but he can’t. Eventually Jeremy will run out of canvas to use for his blood artwork. Jeremy is not a masterpiece with the scars, but Michael still loves him no matter what. 

“Any better today?” Michael asks worriedly seeing Jeremy looking rather upset, the next To day at school.  
“Another nightmare.” Jeremy mutters putting earbuds in his ears and taking Michael’s hand. “They never seem to stop. I’ll be okay.”  
“You think so?” Michael asks kissing his forehead.  
“I have to be.” 

Jeremy looks at Michael and sees the worry. Jeremy gives a weak smile not telling Michael what happened to him last night. Jeremy considered suicide as a true option. What good is it to be alive if it’s only ever in pain? He looks at Michael. 

“I love you Mikey.”  
“I love you too.” Michael says. 

And those were the last words the the pair said to each other. Michael comes to school the next day and his boyfriend isn’t there. Or the next day. Or the next day. Or the next day. Michael’s in tears and he seems to have an attack. Where is his Jeremy? 

“Michael?” Brooke asks looking at him one afternoon. “I’m sorry about what happened to Jeremy. It must be really hard for you.” 

Michael cocks an eyebrow at Brooke. How could Brooke know about what happened to his boyfriend before he did. 

“What happened?” He asks looking at Brooke through his tears.  
“You don’t know? I’m sorry! I assumed it’s why you were crying.” Brooke says shyly. 

It’s odd behavior for Brooke. She’s usually not so shy or quiet around people, and especially not Michael. Then the worst thought races across his head. He shoots a look at Brooke. 

“What happened?” He repeats this time with more concern in his voice.  
“I…I..” Brooke stutters. “Michael I don’t know how to tell you this.” Brooke sighs. “Jeremy committed suicide. He’s dead.” 

Michael feels the entire world stop. Jeremy’s dead. Jeremy’s dead and he couldn’t stop him. Jeremy’s dead and he had no idea. Jeremy’s dead and didn’t even tell Michael he was suicidal. Jeremy’s dead….and he didn’t even say goodbye. 

“Oh.” Michael says feeling more tears. 

Michael suddenly feels all the happiness he’s ever felt is gone. Everything he’s loved won’t ever be the same again. The next day, Michael tries to live life dealing with the fact Jeremy’s dead. He can’t listen to music, not without thinking of him. He can’t play video games. He can’t get high. He can only cry. 

Michael stays home from school for awhile and his parents don't seem to mind. Michael is so heart broken. He stays in the living room lying on the couch. He can't go in his room. He can't go in his basement. Everything's different now. Nothing's the same. It never would be again. Michael hasn't slept in days because dreams and nightmares of Jeremy haunt him. After exactly two weeks, he can't take it anymore. Michael walks in his bathroom and slits his wrists open.

“I'm sorry. I know, I promised I wouldn't.” Michael sighs. “But I said if you do it, so will I.” 

Michael lets himself bleed out. The last thing he sees is his pacman tattoo. He couldn't leave without Jeremy. So now he can be with him forever. Player one and player two. Game over.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a bit of an angsty person...
> 
> BUT IF YOU ARE TOO  
> "In His Eyes" is a fic I wrote with my friend, go check it out! I promise you, there's no death in that one.
> 
> If you're feeling in need of fluff you should go to my co-writer, the one who wrote "In His Eyes" with me, page! Her name is PlayerTwoHeere  
> Go check her out!


End file.
